Kim Kardashian is able to squeeze your face | Arwa Mahdawi

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The Kardashians wish to monetize your chin

In the event you’ve acquired $48 and a burning want to seem like you’ve simply had main jaw surgical procedure, then you definitely’re in luck! Kim Kardashian’s shapewear model Skims has simply come out with a contraption known as the Seamless Sculpt Face Wrap, which it describes as its “first-ever face innovation”. It’s basically a bit of Velcro that goes round your face to offer what the advertising and marketing copy describes as “focused compression for shaping & sculpting” by way of “collagen yarn”. No, I don’t know what meaning both.

Whereas I could also be a tad unclear on how “collagen yarn” is meant to work, I can let you know precisely how the Kardashian-Jenners function: if there’s an insecurity that may be monetized, they’ll discover a technique to monetize it. Over time the reality-TV-famous household have constructed an empire flogging the whole lot from doubtful detox teas to skincare merchandise whereas posting closely edited photographs that reinforce toxic beauty standards. The brand new face wrap seems to be an try to money in on rising curiosity round what has been dubbed a “snatched jawline” – which is basically a really chiselled jaw. A lot of doubtful merchandise, together with jaw massagers and “mastic chewing gum”, have popped up, promising that can assist you obtain this look. Now Skims has come out with its personal thrilling face innovation to get into the motion.

The medical-looking Face Wrap additionally appears to play into the best way through which cosmetic surgery has grow to be normalized. Celebrities was pretty hush-hush about going underneath the knife. Now they’re spilling all the details about which physician they went to for his or her procedures and the way a lot it price. One surgeon instructed Folks journal that the general public is beginning to see cosmetic surgery as simply “another form of self-care”.

Whereas Skims’ new face wrap could scream “ineffective gimmick that promotes unhealthy magnificence beliefs”, it has already bought out and generated one uncommon movie star endorsement. In an Instagram video posted on Thursday Anthony Hopkins sported one of many Skims masks and jokingly slipped again into his Silence of the Lambs character, “the late, great Hannibal Lecter”, who wore an analogous chinstrap within the movie to curb his cannibalism. “Hey Kim, I’m already feeling 10 years youthful,” Hopkins says. In a caption he added: “Don’t be afraid to return over for dinner.”

Additionally chiming in on all of the Skims chatter is Katie Piper, a mannequin and TV presenter who was the sufferer of an acid attack in 2008 orchestrated by her ex-boyfriend. In a TikTok posted on Friday Piper stated that the Kardashians’ “asset funding providing” reminded of her what she needed to put on throughout her burn survivor restoration. “Please, individuals, don’t imprison your face on this contraption,” Piper says. “Don’t be so merciless and unkind to your face … to encase it in a silly strap that, by the best way, does completely nothing.”

Amen to that. Whereas it might be apparent, it’s price reiterating that the Kardashians and different celebrities don’t look the best way that they do as a result of they strap medieval-looking torture units round their faces whereas they sleep. Relatively they shell out for costly procedures like $100,000 deep plane facelifts and $500,000 facial rejuvenations. In 2023 Sharon Osbourne instructed the Telegraph that whereas she hadn’t stored a working complete of how a lot she had spent on beauty surgical procedure, “it should prime greater than one million.” You should buy no matter form of physique you want lately – it’ll simply price you an arm and a leg.

Anti-abortion Texas Republican accused of paying for abortions

The Republican state consultant Giovanni Capriglione performed an instrumental half in guaranteeing Texas has a few of the most restrictive abortion legal guidelines within the US. Now a former grownup entertainer known as Alex Grace has claimed that she was romantically involved with Capriglione – who’s married with children – for nearly 20 years and he “funded a number of abortions for his personal private acquire”. (There are another extraordinarily disgusting allegations involving cookie batter that I gained’t repeat.) Capriglione has admitted to having an affair however says the remainder of the story is lies. Whereas I can’t affirm this explicit case, there are many different documented situations of anti-abortion extremists funding abortions for their mistresses.

Elon Musk reposts tweet claiming girls had been ‘constructed to be traded to a different tribe

In the meantime, Donald Trump has been banging on about how Jeffrey Epstein “stole” Virginia Giuffre and different younger feminine staffers, who he employed from the president’s Mar-a-Lago country membership. Isn’t it beautiful that the lads who appear to contemplate themselves masters of the universe all appear to imagine girls are their private property?

Ghislaine Maxwell has been moved to the identical jail as Elizabeth Holmes

Maybe the pair of them will collaborate on a new venture.

MasterChef contestant edited out of sequence after asking for it to not be broadcast

Sarah Shafi stated she didn’t want the new series to be aired following allegations in opposition to the presenters Gregg Wallace and John Torode. As a substitute the BBC edited her out of it. “I didn’t say edit me out,” Shafi stated. “I stated: ‘Axe the present … Distinguished figures have been abusing their energy. What message does that ship out to girls?”

Katy Perry and Justin Trudeau had been seen on a dinner date

After telling us all she was going to place the “ass” in astronaut, Perry appears to be sharing the identical orbit because the former Canadian prime minister.

How did interval drama get so raunchy?

Hollie Richardson does a deep dive into the sudden explosion of steamy scenes in costume dramas.

Nintendo of America as soon as recommended giving Pikachu ‘big breasts

Pikachu is a cute little Pokémon species and, according to a newly surfaced interview, it virtually acquired given female breasts for the American market with a purpose to enchantment to the kind of people that prefer to sexualize animated characters.

How Israel triggered a famine in Gaza

A “worst-case situation” human-made famine is now unfolding in Gaza – and the US continues to facilitate Israel’s genocide.

Australian lawmaker says girls like hairdressing and males like maths

Liberal Nationwide celebration MP Terry Younger has spoken out in opposition to a push for gender quotas by saying that women and men are drawn to different careers. Males like maths and bodily exertion, based on Younger, whereas girls like styling hair and caring for others. “[I]t’s 2025,” the infrastructure minister, Catherine King, stated in response. Your gender by no means means a job is off limits.”

The week in pawtriarchy

Let’s head to Florida now, the place police recently arrested a Chuck E Cheese mascot for bank card fraud. “Chuck E, include me,” an officer stated as they led the big mouse away in handcuffs in entrance of horrified kids. It’s not clear if a mugshot is offered however one imagines police photographers requested the rodent to say “cheese”.





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